Dee D. Jackson – ‘Cosmic Curves’

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This might just be the most insane track I’ve ever covered on this blog. And I mean that in the most sincere and wonderful way.

The song is a batshit insane narrative worthy of a space opera. There’s a narrator:

It is the interstella light year two thousand and zero seven nine megawatts

That’s not how time works.

So Dee D. is in court for treason for causing a robot to fall in love with her (complete with a cameo from another song). And what is Dee D.’s response?

I’M THE COSMIC LADY WITH THE COSMIC CURVES
I’M HERE TO GIVE YOU WHAT YOU ALL DESERVE
I’M THE COSMIC LADY WITH THE COSMIC CURVES

… which I’m not sure would stand up in court.

By the way, the court’s gasps are edited in at every turn and it’s AMAZING.

And then the goddess Venus rocks up:

WHO IS THIS WOMAN WHO CALLS HERSELF VENUS?
IT IS I WHO IS THE GODESS OF LOVE
SHE IS AN IMPOSTER AND SHOULD BE CAST INTO INFINITY!

And then she’s sentenced to eternity in a black hole. Cosmic curves and all.

In all seriousness, this song is an absolute joy by melding excellent production with pure silliness. The electric guitars, synths and percussion all meld to form some of the best space-disco you’ll ever hear.

 

Track: Cosmic Curves
Artist: Dee D. Jackson
Year: 1979
From: Cosmic Curves [Jupiter]

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